Monday, February 26, 2018

The art of Exceptional-ism!

I know, I know at times I make up words or improperly string words together to make a point.   However, in my opinion this would be a great word.  How does one go from mediocre to exceptional?  How does one take on the journey of becoming amazing?  How does one celebrate the quest to be exceptional or live the life of their dreams on a daily basis?  Exceptional-ism is a choice and a life-style!

In the 21st Century we have become used to the thought that if this doesn’t work, I will just do the other thing instead.  We are inundated with choices and options for our children and ourselves so if one thing doesn’t work out, we move on to the next.  This goes against all I was taught as a child.  Remember the old saying, “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.”  Well, that saying has been replaced with “if at first you don’t succeed try again, and if that doesn’t work or it is too hard, or inconvenient, we will find something else and quit the thing that is giving you a difficult time.” 

In the 21st century most parents and adults are searching for that one thing that hits every point on their check list.  It excites, motivates and you are good at it.  Well, 99.9% of the time, this is not really going to happen.  If you are lucky, maybe you find the activity on the first try and stick with it.  However, the reality is, we continually search for our children or ourselves to shine in the activity that is best for them.
The age old saying is, you can polish a dull, ugly stone and with enough polishing it because a beautiful work of art possibly even a diamond in the rough or a gem.  The theory of practice makes perfect, is true.  We have a saying in the martial arts -  fall down 9 times get up ten. Basically it implies don’t quit, don’t give up, don’t  give in.  The real thought behind the sayings is simple, if you want something or as parents you want things for your child, then DO NOT let them quit.  You may want to refer to my other blog post “I quit!” or “Mom, I want to quit, will you quit with me?” 

I have also heard hundreds if not thousands of times parents tell me, “we don’t want to force our child.”  I know for a fact this is simply not true, because you force your children to do things all the time.  What if your child didn’t want to go to bed on time or brush their teeth, would you allow it? The answer is, NO!   So the real question is why do you say you don’t want to force them to do something.  The real true answer is you aren’t sure if this is worth pushing or forcing or arguing  with them over.   That leads to the old defeatist statement – We chose our battles wisely.  I know this is true for some, but the reality is, you know what is right for your child and what their future will hold if you do force, encourage and stay consistent with an activity you will see and achieve results unimaginable.  If I had a dollar for every person that heard my speech and didn’t listen I would be a millionaire. However, I also have heard those that did take my words of advice, stood tall and held their ground.  They have come back to me with praise and accolades on why it was the best choice they ever made.   

Exceptional-ism is forged on consistency and practice, going through trials, tribulations, failure and success is all part of the journey.  A student only becomes exceptional if you they put the time in or you push the envelope for them.  Remember, they are no aware and do not have the knowledge you have to make decisions. That is why it is called coaching or parenting.  I have taught martial arts for over 35 years.  I have taught 10’s of thousands of students in my martial art school.  I have taught all over the world and have even coached thousands of martial art school owners and teachers.  My goal is to encourage you to stop searching and simply stick with your activity and become amazing becp,e EXCEPTIONAL.   

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